Warm water, honey & cold Coors Light

Sorry I didn’t write more peeps about last night! See, after watching THERESA do Karaoke (which ends at 1) we ended up talking and shooting the shit until like 4 or something! So, your girl was BIZEAT! okaaayyy?? It was a loooong night! But, lots of fun, so.. I guess that’s ok. I wanted to go LIVE, but, my wife insisted I rest my vioce.. You can probably conclude that I SUCK at VR lol.. Today? I’m not talking… WARM WATER, HONEY, and a COLD COORS LIGHT!  Yeah.. that should do it! lol!

When we got to the bar last night, it was a PLEASANT, SWEET AS HELL surprise to see that they’ve updated the outter sign with IN THE TRENCHES info!! It’s my FIRST one!! We took a pic of it for you guys!! So those of you who are outta town can check it out too! Wish you were here to celebrate this with us!

We’re having more and more people show up each week! Of course you have the occassional reeeealy small crowd, but, hey! That’s great too! Oh peeps, I just LOVE IT! LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!

HOLLA AT ALL MY PEEPS AT GOOD TIMES!!!! HOLLAAAAA!!!!

I am going to reflect on and enjoy this moment peeps..

Had a blast!

HAD A BLAST AT “IN THE TRENCHES” LAST NIGHT! GOT TO MEET UP WITH MY DE. PEEPS! MORE COMING IN FOR THE WEDDING WEDNESDAY! CANNOT WAIT! JAY AND BETH! SOOO CUTE! AND SUZE!? OH SUZE.. LOL YOU KNOW WHAT? I CAN’T WAIT TO DO IT ALL AGAIN NEXT WEEK! JAY TOOK VIDEO! WE’LL HAVE THAT UP SOON PEEPS!

I could trip.. But, it’s not worth it. We had a GREAT NIGHT tonight, and life is good.. and I’M GETTING MARRIED!! 

I don’t need no fucking mic

OK!! So, I didn’t get to tell you guys about this past week! Thanks to my Baby and her getaways.. She so knows what I need all the time.. See.. She (as well as you guys) knows that this is THE MONTH.. MARCH.. lol I can smile about it now.. But, Baby and a few of you and actually a line sister or two, talked to me last year and said that I still had a lot of “stuff” going on regarding my father’s death. I mean.. Here we are.. year 6.. I think I didn’t really start to grieve until a couple of years ago. I don’t know.. something in me still waited for the phone to ring and for him to be there.. It’s weird, I know.. But, when you have someone there in your life constantly.. every day for 34 years.. it’s a head fuck when they’re gone all the sudden. I’m sure some of you can feel what I’m saying. It was sudden. He wasn’t sik. So… it was a total head fuck. BUT.. I didn’t even realize that I would become a total bitch around Feb pr March.. and STAY there until after out birthday passed on May 19. It’s weird! I don’t even feel that way now. I understand it.. Many of you guys may have noticed, but, these were mostly my old friendships that came back who suffered. Well, not really, cause my friends know me and love me.. (God I’m lucky!).. but, as a listener said a long time ago.. “you push people away”.. yeah! she had a point, although, at that time, I HAD  to! I had run into some fucked up individuals.. you feel me? lol

BUT.. IT’S A NEW YEAR .. a NEW SITUATION.. and I’m TRULY HAPPY!! I always was.. But, there was something missing.. that something was my Father.. Being as though my mom isn’t really present in a supportive loving way, it only amplifies the fact that I am ON MY OWN. lol! It’s all good.. I always was! Pretty much anyway! Until I met my Baby..

Soooooooo.. thus.. the beautiful hiatus that I went on that I didn’t even know I was going on.. You see, after my sister and my mom.. I was like.. oh see.. FUCK THIS SHIT! I’ll just have the wedding with a small group of friends and SOME family.. BUT.. Now, I’m feeling festive about it. I have the approval of the next guy in line to my dad.. (My Dad gave us his blessing a looong time ago).. but, we thought he’d be here.. Now.. If my brothers can’t make it to the wedding for some reason, Baby’s Brother is going to give me away. My Dad would approve.. Her family loves me.. and I love them so.. I mean.. We’ve been one family for so long. I think God would understand..

We may have a change in VENUE.. I have to talk to TONY.. we’re not telling until the day of.. we want our peeps to be surprised! I think they will be.. This is going to be one hell of a wedding.. CAN U SAY.. FUN FUN FUN!! 

fun and love..

dayum! I DIDN’T EVEN GET TO THE STAND UP! ok..

I did two gigs last week peeps! My standard GOOD TIMES gid on MONDAY.. but, before that, I got to participate in the AFTRERNOON DELIGHTS program over at the EROTIC HERITAGE MUSEUM! It was fun as hell! I got to meet lots of other creative types.. Weirdos like me.. and it was PURE BLISS! You HAVE GOT to visit this place! AFTERNOON DELIGHTS in EVERY 3RD SATURDAY of the month! I’ll be there next month! COME ON OUT! Not just that day! Go, and weekend and see whaqt the fuck! you will be like.. umm.. WHY DOESN’T MY TOWN HAVE ONE OF THESE!

So, yeah.. there was a MAGICIAN there named BIZARRO.. he’s from SHORT BUS COMICS! and AMANDA performed.. so nice.. Jazz.. and I did my raunch of course (it’s EROTIC HERITAGE FOR GOD’S SAKE!) AND Amanda’s friend.. I can’t remember his name.. just his fingers. He’s a pianist. Self taught! Just started taking lessons like 3 months ago! YOu should check him out! It’s like this HUGE museum with all this KOOL ASSED SHIT! I mean.. Come on.. Old John Holmes shit playing right there for you! in a lounge type area.. BEHIND THE GREEN DOOR! I MEAN.. THIS PLACE IS LIKE 2 FLOORS! oh holla..

Then… we had GOOD TIMES! on Monday.. ALL THE WHILE MY WIFE IS CARTING ME UP AND DOWN THE MOUNTAIN SO I CAN CHILL.. OH I LOVE HER.. THANK YOU GOD FOR PUTTING US TOGETHER.. 

MONDAY NIGHT was fun.. SMALL BUT AWESOME CROWD! LESBIANS GALORE! and I LOVED IT! The MICS DIDN’T WORK! See.. When we did the mic chek they worked.. Then, I turn off the mic. to save the battery.. well, when it was time to go.. NO MICS WORKED! Manuel.. My awesome boyfriend bartender was so upset! You see, sometimes, the guy before you will leave the mics on and they drain the battery. oh well! I’m bringing my own batteries from now on! I still did the show though! shoot.. I DON’T NEED NO FUCKING MIC! But, it SURE IS NICE! dayum! lol!

Racing like bats out of hell

HOLLA PEEPS!! We just got home!! Had to drop Derrick off after the show (radio).. You know.. I’m not sure that going LIVE on Monday nights is gonna work! I mean, we were racing like two BATS OUTTA HELL to make it to the station on time tonight.. lol Had a blast with AMANDA and TONY, DUSTIN, RICKY, AND MARK.. GOOD TIMES! OH! and DERRICK! LOL!

Speaking of (GOOD TIMES) .. Tonight’s crowd was AWESOME!! I gotta send a shout out to my man SEESHEE!!! (sp).. HOLLAAA SEEEEEEE!!!!

I’ll be doing IN THE TRENCHES at the EROTIC HERITAGE MUSEUM on SATURDAY at 3:00pm peeps! If you’re in Vegas come on by! BIG shout out to AMANDA and her gurlz, and her Mom! HOLLAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! OH! And it was a GREAT surprise to see LOCQ there! HOLLAAA BOYFRIEND! You guys’ll meet him soon! He’s a fortune teller/tarot card reader, and he’ll be on the show! You know.. At IN THE TRENCHES, I’ve met some really interesting people! COMEDY FANS RULE! hey! That includes you guys! Holla! <3 u guys!

CAN’T WAIT TIL NEXT MONDAY NIGHT!!!

Now, I’ll concentrate on Saturday!!! I can’t wait to go and see the EROTIC HERITAGE MUSEUM! I mean, it’s literally a MUSEUM of SEX EDUCATION for lack of a better term.. You can ask ALL KINDS OF SEX QUESTIONS, and they’ll ANSWER YOU! What u say? I’m really gonna be a stud after going there! HEYOOOOOOOOO!!! Oh.. your girl is ALL ABOUT THE LEARNING!! 

Monday nights, Erotic Heritage Museum

I’ll tell ya! It’s been 4 months since I’ve been home on a Sunday night!! Watching BIG LOVE and I don’t know WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON! Anyway..  haha! BILL is some kind of public official now or some shit! I am SOOO far behind..

Anyway.. IN THE TRENCHES has moved to MONDAY NIGHTS peeps! HEYOOOOOOOOO!!! My plan is to still do a live show!! The only bummer? I can’t stay and hang out and kick it with my peeps after the show.. I gotta run if I’m going on the air live!!

I’m really stoked about this new chapter peeps!! We’re at the EROTIC HERITAGE MUSEUM this Saturday too peeps! I don’t want to put the time here.. I’m not exactly sure of the time.. We’ll fill you in tomorrow night!

Hussling fliers and noisy sneakers

HOLLA PEEPS!!! Last night was fun! First I gotta thank Derrick and Baby for getting out there in the rain and passing out fliers with me. lol! That was so much fun.

We’ll tell you about it tonight if we get a chance. Sunset’s coming on tonight! HEYOOOOO!! Anyway.. It was all rainy and shit yesterday! All kinds of rain and cold.. But, I was DETERMINED to get out there and hand out my fliers and meet the peeps!! It’s been a long time since I done that! I forgot how much I LOVE LOVE LOVE direct marketing. That’s what I did from like 19-30 or so.. Dayum! to be 19.. or 30 again lol! But.. You gotta see the how I get down though! lol! Baby and Derrick can tell you about me and handing out fliers.  Anyway.. all in all, it was a small crowd. But, they ALL got every joke, which was awesome. We will have to put the video up! My shoes kept sticking to the floor lolol! So, what did I do? yup! Took my sneakers off! lol! What u say? They were making this velcro (sp) type noise. It was great for a while! I used it! But, then after a while Baby heckles (TAKE YOUR SNEAKERS OFF!) haha! So, I did! HEYOOOOOOOOO!! HOLLA AT THERESA AND AMANDA!! “OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH AMANDA!!” WHat u say? I like that song! Dayum! ok.. SIDETRACKED!  CHEF TONY came! I was SOOO SURPRISED!

It’s a shame nobody came out! It was like, one of my better shows I think.. Like.. Now, when there are lots of empty seats, I address it up front! Makes the audience more comfortable.. Cause, when you come out, and there are like only 4 or 5 people in the audience, the first thing they’re thinking when you walk out on the stage is.. “OH NO! WHAT’S SHE GONNA DO?” lol.. I gotta let my peeps know I’m alright! You feel me! So that they can kick back and relax.. enjoy the ride.. I FUCKING LOVE STAND UP COMEDY peeps!! GOTTAM! Anyway.. If you’re on the strip at all, you might see me and my crew out there hussling the fliers! Stop us and say hi! Well, you can stop me.. Baby and Derrick aren’t so “stranger friendly” so to speak. The fact that they spent any time at all walking up to total strangers risking rejection is so heart warming to me.  That is SO out of both of their comfort zones. lol! You have to say hi to them first. Me! You can just start fucking with me! HEYOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!  Like, if you walk up to Derrick and just yell HOLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! He’d probably have a nervous breakdown lol!

We, of course all hung out after the show. As always we HAD A BLAST! 

Lets get it poppin peeps!

Baby just left to make fliers peeps!! I’m hanging out.. Well, in.. lol TWEETING away, and just thinking.. You know.. getting my “mind right” for tonight.. I can’t believe that tonight’s my 4 month anniversary at GOOD TIMES and tonight we’re starting the cover charge for admission.. The bar is no cover.. The comedy club, is $10.00.

You know.. This originally began as a 1 month thing.. We were just going to try it out.. See if we could get something poppin’ in there on a Sunday night.. I really have to thank all the peeps who have come out over the months and supported me while I got up there and poured my sour corroded humor out on them.. lol LOVE MY PEEPS!

So, today, I will actually be out ON THE STRIP! Promoting the show!! To the peeps out there! I so cannot wait! I LOVE the strip..

To give people a really good, cheap time!! HOLLAAAAAA!! NOW THAT’S WASSUP!!

But.. yeah.. to have IN THE TRENCHES go from 1 month.. free.. to 2 months.. free.. to 3 months.. free.. to 4 months! 10 BUCKS! See.. that’s nice..

In life you have to.. get IN THE TRENCHES… PROVE YOURSELF.. That’s one of the things I appreciate about mine and George’s relationship. He knows how I work creatively.. He watched me do the same thing with ON YOUR MIND..

Keep in mind that Baby had NEVER done radio before in her life.. I had asked her several times over the years to join me on the air. She shot me down EVERY TIME utnil I wore her down. But.. Back in the early days.. I had never done a talk show before.. I hosted a couple of Jazz shows. We had a good time! But.. still.. Spinning tunes for 3 hours a day isn’t that hard.. You just play the songs and talk about them on the breaks.. LOL!

But, still.. Back then, and I told Baby this.. Some of you may know this if you’ve listened to the show for a while..

I didn’t charge for ad time for like the first YEAR or so we were on the air! I felt like, if I’m any good, then, I will charge. a little.. You know.. work your way up..

So, with that said..

LET’S GET IT POPPIN’!

So, my point is lolol!

Now, I feel worthy to go to the general public and tell them about my shit…

It’s defined now.. I’ve promoted it on FB! Some of my FB peeps have come out! HOLLAAAAAA DONALD AND MULKEY! I met them on here so.. (FB).. the net. you know what I mean..

You know.. I think I just had an epiphany!

I hang out with funny people longer! Do you notice that? LOL!

RICKY AND DUSTIN = FUNNY!
TONY = FUNNY!
BABY = FUNNY AS HELL!
LIKE.. EVEN GEORGE! HE’S STOOPID! AND FUNNY!
WHAT I REALIZED LAST NIGHT?
THERESA = NOT FUNNY! LMAO! (but still.. some of my friends are not very funny.. they’re still my friends! They’re just not so .. funny .. lol)

I may have to bust her balls about that on Monday night. I mean.. Last night I felt like the show just STOPPED.. when she came on! lol! I was like.. “oh see.. why didn’t you just stay home.. or MAKE IT FUNNY! LOL!)..

Yes.. I AM STILL on her BACK BRACE.. It’s gonna take her a while to live this one down…

SEE! I think I have to teach her to laugh at herself..

Cause.. when she fell out of the chair on to the floor at work.. she was really upset that her co-workers laughed at her! I mean.. I get that.. but.. come on now!

DUDE..

if MY WIFE! who’m I love BEYOND ALL MEASURE AND COMPREHENSION.. fell out of the fucking chair at work? while we were ON THE AIR.?

ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm………..

I WOULD CRACK THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BUT SEE! THAT”S JUST ME! I’M CRAZY!

LOL!

But really.. So, that’s why I’m kicking it with you guys, then, going to the strip.. then, texting the refular Sunday crowd homies… and GOING FOR IT! Theresa brings my energy down. Gotta kick it with her on OFF DAYS! LOL!

I told her that last night though. I talked to her on the way home from the station. I think she gets it.. I’ll talk more about it on Monday..

So, yeah.. I guess I’m RAMBLING..

HOLLA! LET’S GET IT POPPIN PEEPS WITH SOME MUSAAAAK!

It’s like orgasm without sex

FIRST of all.. Let me start by THANKING EVERYBODY WHO CAME OUT TONITE!! I was feeling the love.. Holla at my white lesbian chick in the front! HOLLAAAA GURRLLLL!!! She was cute! didn’t smile much. But, after the show, we talked, and she was MAD KOOL! I felt her from the stage.. And, of course, I talked to her (from the stage).. Hey! She was with this REALLY CUTE sister!! I was like.. Hhmmmmm…!! Thanks to “MA BOYZ” for bringing them!! They were so awesome! One thing.. You never know.. You could be up there.. Busting your ass to get ONE person to laugh.. And, sometimes you’ll get a chuckle at some point.. Then.. You find out.. They LOVED IT!! That’s such a relief for me!! It’s like.. ORGASM WITHOUT SEX! .. Flirting with the sister was fun! But, I had to tread lightly! She looked like she could beat my ass! Not bigger than a minute though! lol!

Theresa brought SHAWN! lol! He was so cute.. With his SKULL CAP.. You know our girl THERESA has a STABLE of men to choose from.. lol… She’s just like.. HEY! Wanna go to IN THE TRENCHES?? She like NEVER has a hard time getting a date! LOL! Shawn has come twice now.. Nice guy! He went with THERESA to shoot a VIDEO before the show.. With that guy.. DARRYL KANE.. You remember! THERESA is one of the ANGELS.. It’s DARRYL(L) KANE AND THE ANGELS..

Anyway.. LOL! THERESA, as you guys know from her appearance the other week.. She USED to date this DARRYLL KANE… She was HIS ANGEL… lol!

Well.. he has his band DARRYLL KANE AND THE ANGELS (that just rolls off the tongue so perfectly right peeps?!) and THERESA took her new guy SHAWN to VIDEOTAPE her VIDEO.. CHIIIIILD..

I didn’t get the scoop till after the show but, hunney!! DARRYLL KANE was NOT feeling this SHAWN!

OH! CHECK OUT DARRYLL KANE’S APPEARANCE ON THE JANUARY 15TH ARCHIVE! He’s a kool guy.. Thing is.. All of THERESA’S men are SUPER KOOL! But.. I’m sorry I missed her video shoot.. Darryll Kane was getting annoyed with SHAWN cause he didn’t know how to work the camera or some shit.. And he only got THERESA in the shot.. And then.. DK got smart.. Anyway.. POOR SHAWN! Was upset althrough IN THE TRENCHES.. He didn’t let it show.. He talked to me about it after. See, we all kick it.. You guys know that.. In what I call the “ALCOVE”.. THANKS MARTY BOYFRIEND FOR KICKIN’ THE FAN ON FOR BIG MARSH! He had a sinus infection..

HAHA! What u say peeps! It’s like you’re there with us! I don’t take a moment of it for granted..

And as always.. a big THANK YOU to my wife.. Soon to be official… I love you so much! You are such a good sport and seeing your smiling face out there makes me horny for you! HOLLAAAAAAAAAA AT SUNDAY NIGHTS!! oh yeah.. I <3 U!

Anyway.. I think I’ll post around the forum for a while.